Life is hard. I don’t think anybody would disagree with me on that. But, sometimes, I think it’s hard only because we make it so. It is really easy to focus on what’s not working – unsatisfying job, unfulfilling relationship, wasted time/dreams….never mind car troubles, bills – taxes! The list can go on and on. Many of us think that the deck is stacked against us. And the more that we focus on all of our worries, the more they seem to pile up! Is that all that there really is to life?
Have you ever had “one of those days”? You wake up late for work. When you jump out of bed, you stub your toe. You spill your coffee as you’re trying to get ready, only to realize that you’re out of milk! Your shower is cold, the traffic is worse than usual, and you can’t find a parking space. Naturally, your day is shot. One thing after another goes wrong.
The only thing that was truly wrong in this scenario was the perspective. When we focus only on the negative, that becomes the only thing that we can perceive. When I find myself in that cycle of negative thinking, I immediately stop myself and try to think of something positive. By turning my thoughts to something that IS good, I am able to get a little perspective.
As soon as I wake up in the morning, I lay in my bed and think of something that I’m grateful for. Sometimes it’s too early to even be that positive! In that case, I think of something good that happened the day before – or even just something that I was able to accomplish that day. I don’t get out of bed until I have a positive thought. That helps me set the tone for the day.
Of course, as the day goes on, other fears, worries and resentments pop up. When that happens, I do it again – think of something positive. It’s a constant process. It takes work. The more you practice thinking positive, the easier it gets. I just recently did a gig that wasn’t as profitable as I had hoped. It was a lot of work to prepare for it and it was a long day. Inevitably, I started to get frustrated and depressed. I was able to recognize where that train of thought was going. So, instead I focused on the fact that the day of the event was beautiful and I got to be outside. I was in the company of friends and we made each other laugh all day. It was a great atmosphere with a lot to see. By looking at my day that way, I could see that it wasn’t a loss. I didn’t make a lot of money, but I had a fantastic experience.
So, what do you want your life to be? Do you want a life filled with fear and frustration or one with peace and joy? You get to decide. Nothing is perfect and life is rarely easy, but there is beauty and light everywhere. All you have to do is look for it.
If you still need a little help finding the blessings in your life, come by Cafe Tu Tu Tango this Friday or Sunday night to get a reading from me. Maybe I can help you find a new perspective!
“How unhappy is he who cannot forgive himself.” Publilius Syrus (85BC – 43 BC)
Lately, I have been reflecting a lot on the past – regrets, mistakes. I often find myself wondering, what could I have done differently? From there, it is so easy to start blaming myself for things that didn’t go right. In my experience as a reader, I’m not alone in this.
In my search for answers and understanding, I turned to a deck of Goddess cards that I have. In several readings and meditations, the card for Kuan Yin kept coming up. I always knew of her as the bodhisattva of compassion, but I always thought in terms of compassion for others. But, reading a little more, I realized that she reminds us to have compassion and mercy for ourselves as well.
The fact is, everyone makes mistakes. The most important thing is that you learn from them. It is too easy to focus on the “what if’s” and “if only’s”. The best way to start to move past mistakes and learn from them is through forgiveness.
We are taught from a very young age the value of forgiveness. By forgiving one that has hurt you, you can let go of the pain and move forward. But that teaching is so often focused outwards. Love thy neighbor, forgive and forget, etc – but not love thyself, forgive thyself. I find that we will harbor guilt and resentments towards our own perceived failures that we would never subject a loved one to.
When we forgive someone who has hurt us, we are able to feel lighter – no longer weighed down by negative emotions. Look at the things in your life where you “failed”. If these “failures” were confessed to you by a friend, what would you say to them? How would you console them? Take those words and direct them towards yourself. Forgive yourself for not being perfect, because no one is. Forgive yourself for your failures, because now you know what to avoid in the future. Forgive yourself for the past, because you cannot change it – but you can learn how to be happy today.
Still need a little perspective on how to forgive yourself? Come see me this Friday and Sunday at Cafe Tu Tu Tango for a reading!
I have noticed in many of my readings that people stress because they push themselves too hard. Most of us have been conditioned to put the needs of other’s above our own. We give 110% on the job. We sacrifice for our families. We support our spouses. I’m all for being giving and compassionate, but we must also be mindful of our own needs.
I truly believe that there is no way that we can be there for someone else unless we take care of ourselves first. Many people mistake being selfish for being hurtful and arrogant. That is more like self-centeredness. When you believe that the world revolves around you, that is harmful and egotistical. Every human being deserves respect and compassion. When you expect another to play only the role that serves you in your personal universe, you are being self-centered.
For me, the idea of being selfish is more like self-preservation. We all know to eat when we are hungry, drink when we are thirsty, sleep when we are tired. But what do we truly know about taking care of ourselves? That is where I feel that many people suffer. It is just as important to take care of our minds and hearts as is it is to take care of our bodies. When you find yourself bending to the will of another because you feel that their needs are more important than your own, you do yourself a great injustice. I feel that it is important to recognize what our hearts tell us.
So, the next time that you are tempted to work extra hours just to impress your boss, stop for a minute. Ask yourself, is the idea that you might get a pat on the back for sacrificing your free time worth losing an opportunity to spend some quality time with your children? Do you want to be selfless or would you rather be full of life and love? We must always balance our responsibilities. However, those responsibilities may suffer if we have no self left to give.
If you are tired and stretched thin, come see me. Maybe I can help you see where you can nurture a little bit more of yourself. I’ll be reading at Cafe Tu Tu Tango’s this Friday, Saturday and Sunday.
As a psychic, I have learned that there is a time to hold on and a time to let go. Oftentimes, when people need help in their lives, that is the root of their dilemma. In jobs, relationships, financial matters, letting go can be the key to finding true happiness. How many times in our lives have we found ourselves holding onto something that no longer serves us? How many times have we stuck with “the devil we know” because we are afraid of the unknown?
It is a frightening idea – letting go of something that is comfortable in hopes that there is something even better. I know that very well myself. I have recently found myself letting go of things in my life because they are no longer comfortable. That discomfort forced me to realize that it was time for change. I don’t know where my path will lead me now, but I have faith in the knowledge that my heart is leading the way. I realized that, the unease that I was feeling in my life, was my heart’s way of telling me that it was time to move on.
Regardless of that faith, the fear remains. That is the next thing that I need to let go. And I believe that will happen when the time is right. Many of us are ruled by fear. We let fear dictate how we will react and what we will choose. Until we can make decisions with our heartcenter, those negative feelings will remain. One way that I try banish that fear is to reach out for help. I look for support from those that love me and those that are wiser than me. It is because of that support that I have had the courage to act from my heartcenter and break the ties that have been unhealthy for me. I feel that part of my journey is to pass on that support and wisdom that has been given to me. As a psychic, I try to help people see a solution to their struggles and show them that they have the power to act within themselves.
I feel such joy and gratitude when I am able to impart some hope and some comfort to someone that is in need. I feel like it is my way of giving thanks to those that have helped me. I understand now that holding on to old ideas can hold me back. I understand that the fear of the unknown only has power as long as I hold onto it. And I understand that fear is not nearly as bad as holding onto something that hurts me – no matter how long it has been a part of my life.
If you struggle with fear and discomfort in your life, come and see me. Maybe I can give you another perspective and show you that you are more powerful than you think. Let me pass onto you the hope that has been given to me.
I’ll be reading at Cafe Tu Tu Tango this Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Many blessings!
I notice in my readings, people are often struggling with various challenges. Relationships, work, finances – these are the areas that most people are concerned with when they come to me for a reading. I always think of them as “The Big 3”. I suppose most people wouldn’t seek out a psychic if everything in their life was peachy keen, now would they? And, naturally, people and financial security are high priorities for most of us. People are looking for answers – “How do I fix it?” “Will it get better?”
When I read, I tell people that I can’t give them all the answers. That lies within them. What I can do is give them insight into the deeper issue – another perspective. The real question is what can they learn from their situation? The challenges that we face in our life serve to teach us lessons. We learn our strengths, our weaknesses and how to better follow the path that we are meant to be on. When we know what is not working, we can get rid of it and leave room for something better.
I, myself, have had a reminder of that. I have found myself facing obstacles and situations that I struggle with. But through my work with my clients as well as a lot of soul-searching and prayer, I have been finding answers. I am realizing that some of the messages that I give my clients are also meant for me. Instead of looking at my challenges as defeat, I have begun looking at them as opportunities. They are opportunities for growth and for change. The deeper that I look within, the closer I find myself coming to the Divine. I understand much better now that some circumstances are out of my control. What is in my control is how I deal with those circumstances. I can find explanations for my challenges – I don’t always like those explanations. They often point to weaknesses in myself – and I don’t want to admit my faults. But admitting my faults is accepting them. And accepting my faults gives me an opportunity to change them. I can’t change my past, but I can change my present and ultimately my future.
So, next time you are faced with a roadblock, ask yourself, “How can I turn this into an opportunity? What good can I get out of this situation?” Often, the answer takes time to make itself clear. But, even asking the questions can show you a new direction and help you make peace with your challenges.
If you still have questions, you can always come see me for a reading 😉 This weekend, I will be at Cafe Tu Tu Tango Friday, Saturday and Sunday….come by and let me help you!